I am such a nerd.
I am such a nerd who missed her dose of Methlyphenidate yesterday. Because of this, said nerd is – literally – spaced out today and trying to get back into her groove.
Does anyone else have this problem?
Actually, let me back it up; so I take 18MG of Methylphenidate (generic Concerta, a stimulant) once a day to help with my ADHD “symptoms.” It is what works for me, along with other checks and measures that I try to take every day so that I may grow as a crazy person!
Side note: I say help instead of treat, because I don’t believe that medication alone can treat ANYONE who suffers from ADHD. This is a topic for another day though; I get way too ahead of myself.
Also, I say “symptoms” because I don’t yet know how to describe them properly.
Wow! I digress. I was explaining about how I take this stimulant every day to help me to focus, stay focused, follow through with tasks and projects – albeit not all of them – and generally kick my frontal lobe into fifth gear. Well, I have found out the hard way – many times – that missing a dose is detrimental to my productivity and state of mind.
Today for example wasn’t the worst day ever, but it was kind of a drag. Stayed home with my sick daughter and I am not feeling too great myself either. (Here is Massachusetts, it’s windy and cold.) So all we did today was stay home and pretty much bask in our sickness. Just did nothing productive; a few dishes, tidied up a bit, tried to do creative things – that didn’t work – but on and all, I cannot put my name on this day and give myself a pat on the back.
As an ADDer, that bothers the living hell out of me! I mean, I am trying to be normal here; I am trying to stick to a set list of things that I MUST do each day to try and keep myself sane! (Yet another thing to write about! YAY!) How am I supposed to do that in the case that I forget to take a little pill with breakfast in the morning!? How am I supposed to manage my awesome brain when I leave myself to my own devices? Generally speaking, I can’t be left to my own devices. I would never get anything done if it weren’t for these awful pills I’m taking every day.
There are many thoughts racing in my head at the moment. I am thinking about how taking my medication affects me; I am thinking about how not taking it affects me. I’m thinking about getting back to our daily routines again once everyone is healthy. I’m thinking about eating better, getting more sleep. You see, when I get into a state of mind like I have today, I just get lost in my thoughts. I could probably bore everyone half to death writing and writing about what’s going on in my damned head right now.
But I won’t do that to you or myself for that matter.
I just wanted to see my thoughts in black and white, and put it out there for discussion hopefully. This is one of those things we can learn from each other, not something a doctor or therapist can help us with. This for me is almost my entire lifetime with an ADHD mind.
I’d love to hear from anyone with a missed dose story. It’s good to feel like we are not alone, ya know?
If I don’t get too distracted, I will try to write again tomorrow! Yay for blogging goals!
Have a great night!